Level Up

The new year is almost here and I am ready to move into 2021 with grace.  Ok, not really. If I am painfully honest with myself I have a garbage pile of fear in front of me. You know, the kind that was just stirred up from my deep insecurities and that I just kept tossing over to the side thinking if I just don’t look at it, if I just can’t smell the overwhelming rottenness of it, it will go away. Guess what? It hasn’t gone away. I’ll wait while you try to suppress an eye roll. 

Where does this fear come from? To the outside world, I’ve had a wildly successful year with my last book release, my next book was picked (again) as Amazon First Read for December and it releases on January 1st, and my Book in a Bag kit is reaching new and old writers alike. It’s been an incredible year, so why am I staring down this fear? I could give you some line about how I think I’m not worthy (that would be true), that I wanted all good things to happen but never believed they would (also true), or that I am afraid that I don’t have what it takes to succeed at the next level (true again).

The real truth is that I have to learn how to level up. Each time I meet a goal I have to learn how to take on the challenge of the next level. I’ve always embraced bigger, bolder opportunities but the idea that I will not succeed at that next level is haunting. I have to put on my big girl pants and accept the challenge. I may be uncomfortable. I may face criticism. Now more than ever I need to be surrounded by strong women who are going to hold me up and hold this vision for me when the fear is suffocating.

Do you have your own toxic pile of fear? Does it stop you from meeting a writing goal or silence your voice? Does keep you from living creatively? Does it keep you from leveling up? As 2020 comes to a close I wish all good things for you. More than ever, I wish for you to surround yourself with strong, supportive women who are going to push with you through fear. Reach out to women you feel safe with and who are going to walk with you through the challenges you accept. Then do that for other women.